The bird's wings had done it. They had shattered the stony silence of the house. The sound they inflicted on the air as they flew into the night caused Ethda's skin to blossom goose flesh.
"This is too much!" she said to the emptiness around her. "I can't take it anymore!"
She stood shivering before realizing that hours had passed in a blink.
"How is this possible? All I wanted was peace. Was that too much to ask for?"
She circled the room as she spoke, hoping to conjure someone or something which would either agree or disagree with her. But there was no answer. Only the sound of bird wings bludgeoning the darkling sky.
She looked at her hands, empty now of all embellishment. Her wedding ring was mysteriously gone, along with all the trinkets of motherhood which she'd so proudly worn.
"When did my hands become so old? The skin looks like paper. If I rubbed them together they would tear."
She let them drop to her sides and against the smoothness of her black velvet gown. It felt wonderful. The only wonderful thing she'd felt in a long time. It was comforting and soft; peaceful and black as the night.
She thought she heard footsteps upstairs, and again her skin bore the fruitage of her fear until she remembered that she was alone.
"I truly am a fool!" she said, rubbing her hands against her shivering arms. She looked around hesitantly. "A bit old to be afraid of the dark, yet here I am, as frightened as a school girl."
She tried to force herself to laugh, but an odd sound came from her throat. A sound she'd never made before, but one which was familiar.
The birds had heard it too and responded as instinct ordained. Once again, silence was overtaken by sound. Something had been broken.
The room once completely black, had been invaded. Fingers of moonlight stretched across the floor. They were waiting, as if they anticipated something which could be grabbed and taken back with them into the night.
She slipped on what felt like a rug where she knew no rug had been before. Then she slipped on something else, a child's shoe. She reached down to touch it, but jerked back after feeling something sticky, feathery and warm.
"What is this?" she said, straightening up and getting a glimpse of something red on her fingertips in the moonlight. "Answer me! What is this? What's going on?"
But no answer came. Nothing came, only the sound of bird's wings that were now no longer outside, but in.







Ohh... creepy! Such a suspenseful,scary story!
ReplyDeleteVery Creepy and really like the descriptions, good stuff
ReplyDeleteOdd. I want just two or three more sentences. Crows are creepy in the right context.
ReplyDeleteWow Rachel, this is chilling. It reminds me of the movie The Birds, which terrified me. Crows are always creepy if you ask me.
ReplyDeleteEspecially love the "fingers of the moonlight" description.
Very creepy. I have a very strong fascination with crows, and a murder of crows conjures all kinds of dark things. This was eerily descriptive.
ReplyDeleteThis is cool, a touch of dark. "Fingers of moonlight" is a great visual that fits so nicely.
ReplyDeleteAnother beautifully written piece here, Rachel. Your prose is almost poetic. I was left a little wanting at the end, with no firm conclusion, but it may have done exactly what you wanted in that it left me with a meloncholy sense of forebrooding. Somehow I doubt she sees the dawn of a new day.
ReplyDelete~jon
This was really lovely, in a dark kind of way. Very vivid.
ReplyDeleteA beautiful, atmospheric piece, full of mood and imagery. Gorgeous settings throughout. But I have to toss my hat in the ring with the "needed a little more" team here; I was left unclear at the ending and with so lovely a piece it stung a little.
ReplyDeleteNevertheless, beautiful work.
Beautiful opening with immediate tension and nice language throughout. Even though I like the phrase "stony silence," I wonder if the first line wouldn't be strengthened by a description as strong as "fingers of moonlight." I'll second the Hitchcock reference--the Birds within a very limited landscape. Thank you for sharing this.
ReplyDelete