Missing in Action

His eyes said, "I'm tired of this endless life of endless agitation."

His sign said,"homeless vet will work for food."

His eyes said, "can't you see I'm ashamed

of what my life has come to?"

His sign said, "come on I'm hungry

and I've no where fit to rest.

Give me a job, any job

and a simple pocket of change,

and I will take it

and be satisified with a hot cup of coffee

and a plate of cheap food

and a newspaper to cover my head."

His eyes said, "you owe me for what I've done for you.

I've killed for my flag and my country,

and I did what I was told.

The blood of the enemy splattered me in my face

just like the cold unwelcoming winds of home.

You owe me dammit, you owe me."

His sign said, "I'll take whatever you've got."

His eyes said, "don't look at me.

I'm lower than I thought I would go.

I used to be a golden-haired dreamer,

everyone's dream of tomorrow,

everyone's hometown hero,

every mother's son and every father's puffed-out pride.

I carved up bodies with bullets

and they, the bastards carved mine.

I came home scarred and battered

though no one could see my pain.

Now I'm standing here with this damn sign,

made of cardboard from some discarded box.

I stand here begging for work and food.

I stand here with hell behind me and hell beside me

and hell in front of me,

hoping for anything from anyone who will spare me some change

or some food or both.

But don't look at me,

Don't look at me!

Don't look at me!

I want you to see me and my damn sign,

But don't look at me!

I'm lost and I can't find my way free.

I lost everything in those jungles

and everything when I came home.

I lost the need to dream or wish or hope

in a bottle or a pill or needle somewhere.

I lost the reason to be who I was

and I don't know how to find it."

His sign said, "I'm tired, and I'm ready to die."

His eyes said, "I'd devour you if I could

and pull you down beside me.

You with your car and your happy life.

You with your family and your house and your job.

You with your eyes staring at me and doing nothing.

You who sees my shame and then

turns away disgusted by me.

'Here I am, another homeless guy begging!

Ha ha ha, aren't I something, dirty and filthy and shivering in the cold?

'You'll pass by me like so many others

and not even think twice

about the guy who stood before you just a second ago.

You'll just see "homeless",

but you won't see me,

and you'll drive on back

to your life

and your home

and I'll still be out here with my shame

and my sign,

and my empty belly

and my cold feet,

while you dine or recline

or whatever you do.

Damn you.

Damn you,

Damn you."

His sign said, "please."